Bill O’Reilly is not a Catholic (And So Can You!)

December 8, 2012

Sorry, I couldn’t resist modifying FFRF’s title to be a humorous reference to Stephen Colbert. I hope he won’t mind.

Anyway, this is a fantastic article about what the Catholic church requires for someone to call themselves a Catholic. According to church doctrine, if you don’t meet the requirements, you are not a Catholic. Read the article and try coming up with a guess of how many of the world’s 1.2 billion self-proclaimed Catholics are really Catholic under church dogma. I’m guessing the number of true Catholics is actually 2 or 3 orders of magnitude smaller.

Bill O’Reilly is not a Catholic, and neither are you!

Just on the very very off chance that Stephen Colbert or one of his staff actually (dare I say it) inadvertently stumble across my blog, I’ll plug Colbert’s book with the reference for my hybrid title in hopes of appeasing his lawyers him.

I Am America (And So Can You!)


LipoBlow ™

September 28, 2007

There are approximately 1.2 billion people in the world that are either chronically hungry or starving. There are also approximately 1.2 billion people in the world that are either overweight or obese. This odd coincidence led me to a bizarre conclusion.

(I do not remember the exact source of my numbers. It was probably Plan B 2.o or Collapse, but could have been some other source. If you have more accurate figures, please feel free to post them. It will not be likely to change the point of this post, however.)

So, here is my idea, in case you didn’t guess it from the title. We can liposuck the fat out of the overweight and obese people of the world and either LipoBlow ™ the fat subcutaneously into the bodies of the starving masses or mix it with grains into nice high calorie LardAss ™ cakes to be shipped to the hungry and starving people of the world.

This could dramatically improve the health of the world’s population by simultaneously reducing obesity and starvation. Of course, human fat would not provide many of the other nutrients required by the starving people. But, when one is starving, even empty calories are a good thing.

Is this just the sick humor of a misanthrope making a statement about the state of the world or a workable solution? Which would be more appealing or less appalling, LipoBlow ™ or LardAss ™ cakes?

(The inclusion of humor in both the tags and the categories for this post probably gives me away.)