My wife and I have been married for 20 years. One man, one woman, works for us. Perhaps I just have a lot of vasopressin coursing through my veins. Whatever. In recent years, people have been trying to convince the masses in the U.S. that if we allow homosexual marriage, it will somehow weaken either my marriage or the institution of marriage. Bullshit!!
If anyone’s marriage is in such poor shape that seeing a happy lesbian or gay couple is going to weaken it, get a divorce now. Your marriage is already gone. And, one of you is probably a latent homosexual or bisexual. There’s nothing wrong with that. Get in touch with your own sexuality and move on.
Life is difficult enough for everyone. If someone has found someone else with whom they wish to spend the rest of their life, someone who makes them truly happy, that is a beautiful thing and to be encouraged.
Oh no!! But, what about any children they may choose to raise?! I am not a parent. My wife and I have decided to give our children the greatest gift of all, not having to deal with the world in its present and deteriorating state. However, I would strongly state that nothing screws up a kid like being raised in a non-loving home. Nothing gets a kid off to a great start like being raised in a loving and supporting home. Could anything be more important than that?
Further, there is a real human rights issue here. Marriage isn’t just a label for living together. Marriage conveys many rights in our society. To deny these rights due to one’s sexuality is truly unconscionable. If you are a heterosexual, imagine yourself on the other side of this debate. Imagine that you and your beloved no longer have any of the following partial list:
- Hospital visitation – Often at the end of one’s life, hospital rules regarding visitation are very different for a spouse than for friends, lovers, and even other close family members.
- Next of Kinship – I may not be describing this properly from a legal standpoint. A spouse is one’s closest relative. This is true in both law and actual fact. Who knows every time you wake up coughing in the middle of the night? Who knows your real thoughts and wishes for what should happen if your brainwaves stop? If you have no living will, the next of kin will make the decision. Many people have very different views on this from their other close family but are likely to share them or at least make them known to their spouses.
- Next of Kinship, take 2 – When one dies intestate (without a will), the closest family member inherits the estate. This is always the spouse first.
- Health Insurance – If only one member of a marriage is working, the worker’s job will likely allow them to include their spouse on their health insurance policy. I do believe some progress is being made here for coverage of a life partner. However, the issue goes away immediately if we call this marriage.
- Adoption – It is easier for a married couple to adopt. As there are many children who are unwanted, having a larger pool of potential adopters can only be a good thing, especially if you agree with my point about being raised in a loving home.
I strongly believe that any people that get together in love and want to commit themselves in marriage should be allowed to do so as one of our inalienable rights.
I’m not sure how many people will notice that I did not specify that there be only two people. As I stated above, one man one woman works for me. However, as long as it is not sex-biased, as in the case of Mormon men wanting to be allowed to have multiple wives, but not allowing Mormon women to have multiple husbands, I have no problem with allowing more than two people to marry. The plural of spouse may be spice.
Perhaps I get too much of this from reading Heinlein (Stranger in a Strange Land, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress, etc.). However, keep in mind, that if a stable family is the goal, more spice provide more stability for raising the children, as there is less chance that the children will be orphaned. In particular, the idea of line marriages, as described in The Moon is a Harsh Mistress, would provide incredible stability by creating a potentially immortal marriage.
Allowing all types of marriages would truly take the government out of our bedrooms. I don’t know about you, but the thought of W in my bedroom is about as off-putting as it gets.
I’m sure there are many other such issues. Please feel free to post them here.
Most importantly to me though, please explain how anyone else’s marriage is supposed to have an effect on mine.